Kool Keith
Age: 25
Birthplace: Bronx, NY
Likes: Porn, Animals
Dislikes: Girls who are not innovative that don't like to take pictures.
Quote: "I'm the master of the game, all the girls know my name."
Black Elvis
Age: 24
Birthplace: Memphis, TN
Likes: Flashy Cars, Nice Disco Clubs
Dislikes: Evil Twin Dr. Dooom
Quote: "Black Elvis, Rock Star, Walkin' Down Broadway."
Dr. Dooom
Age: 24
Birthplace: New York
Likes: Arms, Hamburgers infested with mice, having roaches around
Dislikes: Ox smell, Dept. of Food & Agriculture
Quote: "I'm a New York psycho buyin' shells in the Hollywood section"
Dr. Octagon
Age: Deceased
Birthplace: Jupiter
Likes: n/a
Dislikes: n/a
Quote: "No please, don't shoot!"
Poppa Large
Age: 35
Birthplace: Bronx, NY
Likes: Daredevil videos, Spinning around in circles
Dislikes: Quicksand, Soft Pretzels
Quote: "I'm Poppa Large, Big Shot On The East Coast"
Mr. Green
Age: 259
Birthplace: Zzyzx
Likes: Big money strip clubs, Wells Fargo, Bank Of America
Dislikes: Purple
Quote: "Being green is easy for me."
Sinister 6000
Age: 7999
Birthplace: Iceland
Warm, Cuddly Woman
Dislikes: Democracy, Carbon
Quote: "Sinster 6000 / new styles I be housing."
Fly Ricky: The Wine Taster
Age: 43
Birthplace: Miami, F.L.
Likes: Salsa Music, Fine Wines, Mongos
Dislikes: Cheap, Inexpensive Wines, Fake burritos
Quote: "I did a show with the Gap Band in Miami."
Rhythm X
Age: 30
Birthplace: BX, New York
Likes: Mae West, Gastronomy
Dislikes: Traffic, Soft Cauliflower
Quote: "Rhythm X roller, my style gets critical, Brain connects, computer rhymes get physical."
Willie Natural
Age: 23
Birthplace: Harlem, NY
Likes: Sofa & Loveseat Combo
Dislikes: Strenuous work or exercise
Quote: "I'm just a natural kinda guy."
Clean Man
Age: 30
Birthplace: Comet
Likes: Girls Who Are Clean
Dislikes: Grime In Hard To Reach Places
Quote: "I've come to get rid of grease and knock out tough stains."
Rev. Tom
Age: 67
Birthplace: L.A.
Likes: Lingere, Politics
Dislikes: People who don't put money in church baskets
Quote: "You best to kneel and let the Reverend heal you."
Keith Turbo
Age: 1
Birthplace: Indianapolis, In
Likes: Oil, Racecar driving
Dislikes: Station Wagons
Quote: "Man, I could throw a 100 pound Walrus through the wall!"
Robbie Analog
Age: 28
Birthplace: Austin, TX
Likes: Vinyl, Cassettes
Dislikes: CD's, DATS, Milk
Quote: "I don't sample jazz records."
Willie Biggs
Age: 22
Birthplace: Uptown
Likes: Blondes, Cold Duck
Dislikes: Landlords, Anntennas
Quote: "Keep it real, represent what? My nuts!"
Mr. Gerbick
Age: 208
Birthplace: Jupiter
Likes: Fishing, Swimming
Dislikes: Wolfmen, Flossing
Quote: "Skin like alligator, carrying a dead walrus."